Image from youtube user dferg100
I’m posting old unpublished material to draw page views for my new book Finally, Some Good News. This story is entirely fictional, it never happened, and the guy in it is not me. I don’t get horny.
(2013)
19 year old Mexican girl on the train. She is wearing flip flops. Day glo orange toenails; her toes curl with her music. Suddenly I understand why guys like sucking toes. Guys talk about things you find disgusting. Eating out a girl’s asshole. Sucking her feet, sniffing her farts, having her piss on you. But you see a five foot two Cal State Los Angeles sophomore with day glo orange toenails and you understand. Every part of the buffalo.
Bangs like Betty Rubble, long, long eyelashes– who ever gave a shit about eyelashes but now I understand. She smiles at me. Licks her lips. What am I gonna say. She has headphones on. Probably Justin fucking Bieber. What am I gonna say but nothing. Girl at the other end of the train is looking at me too. I look up. Eye contact. She kind of arches an eyebrow. This is all women have to do. I can do nothing with it. I can just dream, licking her salty twat and mounting her. Pumping my seed in her belly. Stroking her hair when we’re done. I can dream.
You can’t talk to women anymore. Or you can but you have to be good at it. Fucking up, a prospect on par with the holocaust. Just stare at her toes. Think about sucking them. The dirt from this filthy desert town in the cracks. Think about spreading open her sweaty ass and tonguing the crack up and down, her little muffled moan in the pillow. Her buck teeth. Thank the Lord who gives pretty girls small flaws.
Now she’s on the phone. Jen told her she gets off at three and she’s gonna go to Riverside, she says. I love you. Careful, OK? Make sure you bring your stuff, you know, next time. Put it in your backpack. Ten years, she’ll have five kids and I’ll be dead.
